Posted by: check868 | May 16, 2008

The masochist

Last night, I met with the Google exec again. He flew in from California in order to see me! Which is about the coolest thing ever.

He is a masochist (this post is not for males with weak stomachs). I had him get naked and took a length of rope and wrapped it around his dick and balls. I squoze it as tight as I could, wrapped it once around his dick, squoze it tight, and knotted it. Then I repeated that (wrap, squeeze, knot) until I ran out of rope. Then I got out some clothespins and put some on the shaft and around the ridge between the head and the shaft. And one in that super-sensitive spot under the head for good luck. Oh yeah, and one on each nipple. Then I had him bend over and I flogged him. It was great, every time the flogger hit his butt, the clothespins would clack together. And, of course, he’d yelp.

After a couple dozen hits, I stood him up and took off the clothespins… and then put them on again even more cruelly. I pinched just the tiniest bits of skin in them, and pinched them hard. Then I flogged him again.

After I was tired of flogging him, I had him sit on the tub and I peed on him. “You are smagnificent!” he exclaimed, as I began to piss. I peed in his mouth, which I thought was a bit gross but he loved it. Then I peed on his chest. Then his stomach. Then his face. Then his chest again. I hadn’t peed in a while, and I just kept going and going. I felt like kind of a freak, but whatever. “Wow, you’re really well hydrated,” he commented.

Afterwards he sat at my feet and told me a joke about God giving abilities to Adam and Eve. God says, “Okay, who wants the ability to pee standing up?”

Adam immediately begins begging for it, going on and on about how convenient it will be and how much he’d love to do that, so God gives it to him.

“Well, I need to give you something, too, Eve,” God says. “Let’s see, what abilities do I have left?” He checks, and says, “How about multiple orgasms?”

Hehehe.

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